If You Really Loved Me chords by Tim Minchin

If you really loved me the way you say you do
E
If you love me half as much as I love you
          Bb
You would pluck a planet from the sky
      D
You’d use a star to dot the “i”

...        Gm
When their love for one another is true
Doo doo doo

..  D
But shirking challenges is not what love

       Eb
Is all about
Eb
Love is not all wine and roses
Eb
Sometimes it’s handcuffs and cheese
F
No-one said love is for free
       Am/E
And if you agree with that
               Gm
You’ll sing me passages from the koran wearing nothing but your Bob the Builder hat
               Dmaj#5/Gb
To the tune of waltzing Matilda
       E / / /
I just love the combination of islam, nationalism and buil--der

          Am
Because I need you
       Emaj#5/Ab
Like a tick needs a tock
     C/G
Like bananas need pyjamas
       D7/Gb
Like a nun needs cock
           C
But if you want to put your love for me first
    E
You wouldn’t go through childbirth
               Ab
You’d agree to adopt so that you could stay thin
            D7/Gb
We’ll get a Chinese kid, it could teach us Mandarin
    C
And communists don’t make as much noise
            G
And they’re really good at sharing their toys

          Cm
Because I dig you
        Gmaj#5/B
Like an Aussie digs pies
     Eb/Bb
Like Born-Agains dig Jesus
     A
Like Jesus dug guys