God chords by Tim Minchin

• Difficulty: Intermediate 💪

Key: F

Verse 1:

C            Bb           F
I never had sex inside a church
n.c.
And never had to pray on Sundays
C           Bb             F
Never gave minties to the poor
n.c.
And when I'm six foot under some day
C                F
I’ll be feeling rotten
Bb
Worms eat from the outside in
C                  F
Should I take the wager?
Gm           F/A            Bb
Maybe faking it will get me in
     Gm            C/D
But faking it has always been a sin

Chorus:

F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it
            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking
F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door
F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking
F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me
F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated
F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well
F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated

Verse 2:

C              Bb               F
I know it's a breeze to just believe
n.c.
And dress him up the way you like him
C             Bb                 F
Personally I think he plays the drums
n.c.
And goes about in purple lycra
      C            F
With burgundy leg-warmers
Bb
Fashion never worried him
C                F
There's another option
Gm             F/A               Bb
Maybe disco threads will get you in
     Gm                 C/D
But disco threads have always been a sin

Chorus:

F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it
            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking
F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door
F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking
F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me
F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated
F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well
F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated

Bridge:

Gm             F
Far be it from me to ask you
Dm
Questions you can’t answer
     Gm              F
But tell me why you have to be
Dm
An arsehole all the time
    Gm             F
And far be it from me to throw
   Dm
A spanner at my maker
      C                 Gm                Dm
I’ll just sit back and drink your bloody wine
     Gm                 Bb/C
And leave you to things existential

Chorus:

F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it
            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking
F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door
F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking
F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me
F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated
F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well
F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated

Verse 3:

C           Bb            F
I never had sex inside a church
n.c.
But I love the thought of nuns in g-strings
C             Bb                   F
And I never touched my neighbour's wife
n.c.
But I spilled my share of sacred seedlings
C             F
I would be a psycho
Bb
If I tried to keep my seedlings in
C               F
I've not got a hope in hell
   Gm             F/A             Bb
If wasting sperm stops you getting in
    Gm                  C/D
But who the hell made wasting sperm a sin?

Chorus:

F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it
            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking
F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door
F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking
F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me
F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated
F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well
F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated