Bastard chords by Mark Lemhouse

Tuning: Standard (E A D G B E)

Verse 1:
E
Standing by the jukebox, drinking a mojoto,
     A
with my libido and bean burrito,
E                               B7
I hate this bar, but I love the alcohol.
E
Bartender said I had too much,
    A
you know that pissed me off a touch,
       E       B7                   E
i sais "Buddy, you don't know me at all"

Chorus:
E
you're a bastard, can't you see,
A
you keep on bugging me,
E                         B7
your really getting on my nerves.
E
these old blues they got to go,
A
and no one likes you don't you know,
E            B7                   E
Im no saint, but i think you're a bastard.

Verse 2:
E
This guy cuts the front of the checkout line,
  A
I guess he really needed that box of wine,
   E                     B7
Its 9am and he's already plastered.
E
So I leaned over and hit the intercom,
A
I said "Ground Control to Major Tom,
E                   B7                    E
Attention shoppers, you're all a bunch of bastards.

Chorus:
E
you're a bastard, can't you see,
A
you keep on bugging me,
E                         B7
your really getting on my nerves.
E
these old blues they got to go,
A
and no one likes you don't you know,
E            B7                   E
Im no saint, but i think you're a bastard.

Verse 3:
E
Got a bill collector of the phone,
A
I'm watching the game man, leave me alone,
E                                         B7
Tried to cut him off but he keeps talking faster,
E
Told ya twenty times the check's in the mail,
A
You got to believe me I remember it well,
E                               B7             E
cause when I signed the thing I made it out to Bastard.

Chorus:
E
you're a bastard, can't you see,
A
you keep on bugging me,
E                         B7
your really getting on my nerves.
E
these old blues they got to go,
A
and no one likes you don't you know,
E            B7                   E
Im no saint, but i think you're a bastard.

Slows:
E
Soccer mom in an SUV
A
Talking on the phone, she don't see me,
E                         B7
I'm on the way to meet my master.
E
North bound truck in a southbound lane,
A
drove through my body like an ol freight train.
E                 B7         E
Dead in my tracks...you're a bastard.

Chorus:
E
you're a bastard, can't you see,
A
you keep on bugging me,
E                         B7
your really getting on my nerves.
E
these old blues they got to go,
A
rolling on over to Kokimo,
E            B7                   E
Im no saint, but i think you're a bastard.

Outro:
E
You win the spelling bee,
A
B.A.S.T.A.R.D
E                          B7
You're really getting on my nerves.
E
Bastard. 100 percent.
A
Might as well run for President,
E                 B7
The votes are in, looks like you win
    E
For Bastard.

E             B7             E
Now everybody knows you're a bastard.
E                   B7           E
No matter where you go, you're a bastard.