The Loophole chords by Garfunkel And Oates

Chords with lyrics

Tuning: Standard

Difficulty: Novice

Garfunkel and Oates - The Loophole

**Capo 3rd**

D MajorD            G+G
All my life I've been good
D MajorD                    A augmentedA
Do what my mom and dad and God say I should

D MajorD             G+G
Go to church and Bible School
A augmentedA          D MajorD
To live by God's rule

B minorBm
So whatever people tell me
B minorBm          A augmentedA
That The Bible tells me
D MajorD
I will do

D MajorD                  G+G
Walk the halls at my school with my purity ring
B minorBm                 E MajorE
Unlike those other girls, I've got my morals in check
D MajorD             G+G
It was easy to do until I got a boyfriend
B minorBm               E MajorE
And pardon my French, but he's cute as heck

D MajorD       G+G
And I made a pact
D MajorD       G+G
To keep my hymen intact
G+G          A augmentedA
And Jesus and I are tight

D MajorD            G+G
Never learned about the birds and the bees
B minorBm                  E MajorE
I was taught to keep an aspirin in between my knees
D MajorD                    G+G
'Cause The Bible says premarital sex is wrong
B minorBm               E MajorE
But Jason says that guys can't wait that long

G+G          D MajorD
I don't want to lose him
G+G          D MajorD
To someone who'll do him
G+G              A augmentedA
I need to figure something out

D MajorD                        G+G
Well there's a loophole in The Scripture that works really well
     B minorBm          E MajorE
So I can get him off without going to hell
D MajorD          G+G
It's my Hail Mary, full of grace
    B minorBm             E MajorE
In Jesus' name we go to fifth base!

B minorBm             E MajorE
Oh thank you for making me holy
B minorBm                 E MajorE
And thank you for giving me holes to choose from
G+G              A augmentedA
And since I'm not a godless whore
G+G                A augmentedA
He'll have to come in the back door
Therefore


Chorus:
D MajorD                G+G
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
B minorBm              G+G   A augmentedA
The good Lord would want it that way
D MajorD        E MajorE       G+G      E MajorE
Get that sweet sensation a throbbing rationalization


G+G            A augmentedA
It's just between you and me
G+G                A augmentedA        D MajorD
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see

D MajorD         G+G
It's hard to be as pure as me
B minorBm              A augmentedA
To resist the urge to lose my vaginal virginity
D MajorD          G+G
To wait until my marriage bed
B minorBm               A augmentedA
To give my husband my unsullied maiden head


G+G       D MajorD
So take your cock out
G+G      D MajorD
Shove it in my ass
G+G      A augmentedA
Fuck me until you come

    G+G          D MajorD
Oops! I mean let's join our souls
G+G        D MajorD
And unite our bodies
G+G             A augmentedA
And fly with the wings of God


D MajorD                  G+G
Whatever you do, don't touch my clitoris
B minorBm                     A augmentedA
If you ring Satan's doorbell, God can't ignore this


D MajorD                 G+G
And no prophylactics when you put it in
B minorBm                    E MajorE
'Cause birth control's for sluts and it's a sin


G+G        D MajorD
I've emptied my bowels
G+G         D MajorD
And laid out the towels
G+G        A augmentedA
I'm ready for romance


D MajorD                G+G
Now I'm praying to the Power that's the Highest
B minorBm                 A augmentedA
But of all of my holes, this ones the driest


D MajorD              G+G
And we can't procreate if we anal copulate
B minorBm               E MajorE
And God is OK with sodomy, but only if you're straight


G+G           D MajorD
And I'm staying pure, no matter what
G+G           A augmentedA
So I'm OK with everything butt
Everything butt
Everything butt
Whoa-oh

Chorus:
D MajorD            G+G
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
B minorBm              G+G  A augmentedA
The good Lord would want it that way
D MajorD       E MajorE       G+G    E MajorE
Get that sweet sensation a rock hard rationalization

G+G            A augmentedA
It's just between you and me
G+G               A augmentedA         D MajorD
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see

B minorBm            E MajorE
I do whatever The Bible tells me to
B minorBm               A augmentedA
Except for the parts that I choose to ignore
B minorBm               A augmentedA
Because they're unrealistic and inconvenient
B minorBm           E MajorE
But the rest I live by for sure


G+G                          A augmentedA
So let's not talk about how the Good Book bans shellfish, polyester and divorce
G+G                      A augmentedA
And how it condones slavery and killing gays because those parts don't happen of course
E MajorE                            G+G
Let's cherry-pick the part about losing my cherry and (line up for ambiguities as omissions?)
 A augmentedA               B minorBm
And circumvent any real sacrifice, and still feel pious in my arbitrary parroted
E MajorE
positions

D MajorD         A augmentedA        B minorBm
And don't you dare question my convictions
E MajorE                  G+G
And don't look closely at the contradictions
D MajorD           A augmentedA          B minorBm
And just focus on the sacrificial crucifixion
E MajorE                   G+G
And have faith in its complete jurisdiction

E MajorE
As the only way to measure if you're good or not
And when you're in a debate, just say to “have faith”
                                                A augmentedA
Because when you're up against logic it's the only card you've got

G+G
So close your eyes
A augmentedA
Take a deep breath
And..

Chorus:
D MajorD           G+G
Fuck me in the ass 'cause I love Jesus
B minorBm             G+G   A augmentedA
The good Lord would want it that way
D MajorD       E MajorE       G+G      E MajorE
Get that sweet sensation an irrational rationalization


G+G           A augmentedA
It's just between you and me
G+G         A augmentedA              E MajorE
'Cause everyone knows it's the sex that God can't see
G+G            A augmentedA
Yeah, my chastity belt has locks
G+G         A augmentedA            D MajorD
So sometimes you need to think outside the box