Christmas Is Pain chords by Roy Zimmerman

Chords with lyrics

If you have a harmonica... well... that can liven it up a bit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOm0yQXSzyY

Capo 5 (Roy plays it on capo 6, but do whatever you can sing to). He also throws a hammer on the C majorC chords.

Same chord progression throughout.

[Verse 1]
      C majorC         FF     C majorC
There's a turkey a gobblin' out in the yard
                   FF      G+G
Now he's gutted and stuffed and he's basted and charred
     FF     C majorC       FF     A minorAm       G+G
And your father is whistlin' and washin' the blood down the drain
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 2]
      C majorC             FF      C majorC
There's a crowd on the hillside with hatchets and saws
                FF    G+G
With a keen disregard for the forestry laws
     FF    C majorC       FF      A minorAm      G+G
And they happily hum while the stumps slowly bleed in the rain
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 3]
     C majorC             FF      C majorC
And the stockings are hung by the chimney with care
                    FF     G+G
As if anyone in their right mind would hang 'em there
     FF     C majorC     FF      A minorAm   G+G
And some tired old crooner is croakin' out carols again
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 4]
     C majorC           FF    C majorC
And you wait for an hour to see Santa Claus
                 FF      G+G
And he's covered with velveteen, bourbon and gauze
    FF      C majorC       FF       A minorAm     G+G
And he pinches your mother and she can't find the words to explain
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 5]
     C majorC            FF   C majorC
And the hungry are hungering on Hunger Street
           FF         G+G
While the people on Plenty Street . . . eat
     FF       C majorC      FF       A minorAm    G+G
And you punctured the roof of your mouth on a sharp candy cane
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 6]
         C majorC        FF     C majorC
And all the good cheer is just Madison Ave..news
                    FF     G+G
And all the best Christmas songs were written by Jews
     FF     C majorC       FF     A minorAm     G+G
And the eight tiny reindeer have left an embarrassing stain
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 7]
    C majorC                 FF   C majorC
And two-thirds of the world doesn't give half a damn
                  FF      G+G
And the rest are all bloated on marshmallowed yams
     FF    C majorC       FF     A minorAm      G+G
And if Jesus was here, he'd be sent to the back of the train
       C majorC
Christmas is pain

[Verse 8]
     C majorC          FF      C majorC
And they double the price of whatever you need
                 FF     G+G
Singin', "I pledge allegiance to corporate greed"
      FF      C majorC        FF          A minorAm     G+G
And you're forced to spend several hours conversing with your old Aunt Lorraine
    G+G
who's insane
    G+G
with a brain on a plane to Spain
     G+G
where the main stays rainly in the flat terrain
      C majorC
Christmas is pain