The Transplant Calypso By Jeremy Taylor Transcribed by Kevin Hanssen G D The other day I was feeling ill A D I went to the doctor to get some pills G D He looked at me in despair A D Said my friend you’re badly in need of repair G D Now with his up to date surgery A D We get our spare parts from the menagerie G D So if you’ll kindly sit down a while A D I’ll just telephone for a crocodile
CHORUS G Soon I had the heart of an ape D The liver of a chicken A D The blood of an ox through a tube which they’re stickin’ G D To my spleen which I borrowed from a cow A D I was human once but I’m not sure now. G D Going out one night A D Me and a fella got into a fight G I hit him with the left D I hit with the right A D But somehow I just couldn’t finish the fight G D No matter what I did he kept coming at me A D The stubbornest man I ever did see G D It was in vain I find out at last A D This fella’s got the jaw bone of an ass G I’ve got the heart of an ape etc G D Walking down the street A D me girlfriend I happened to meet G D Me heart went bong-diddy-bong A D Just like the ape that I got it from G Me ox blood boiled D I started to moo A D I was pawing at the ground, what else could I do G D When at last she walked on by A D I said cockle-doodle-doo and started to fly G I’ve got the heart of an ape etc (The last verse is looser and spoken-like; think country and western with a Carribean lilt) G D In the end I was getting fed up A D Said to the doctor, “Look man, I’ve had enough, G D All this animal junk won’t do A D Give me some organ that doesn’t come out of the zoo.” G D He said “Well, how about this for size.” A D I tell you, I could hardly believe me eyes G D I looked at this thing with dismay and suspicion, A D I t was the brain of a politician. G I’d rather have the heart of an ape etc ENDS
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