Tuning: Standard (E A D G B E) Key: E Difficulty: Intermediate Intro: A E B E LUKE: A E B E Come on, grab some ambrosia and let the nectar flow A E B E Why is everyone scraping part of their plate into the fire? A E Is the food really that bad?
LUKE: B Offering to the gods E A E B It's not enough that they're omnipotent and all-powerful E A They need to feel appreciated E B To the Gods! ALL: E To the Gods! Chorus: A E B E Oh, things couldn't be worse A E B E When your parents run the universe A E B C#m Oh, things couldn’t be worse A E B E When your folks run the universe LUKE: A E My dad is Hermes B E He messengers things A E B E You'll know his sign by his shoes with those wings A E B C#m I'd wait by the phone but the phone never rings F# Oh no A E G# C#m When your dad's a god, life can be tough A* N.C. B E I met the guy once and once was enough LUKE: E (Spoken) Annabeth? ANNABETH: G D My mom's Athena A D She’s smart and she’s wise G D A D She’s sworn off gluten and she’s sworn off guys G D A Bm But if she came to camp, it’d be a surprise E Oh no... ALL: E Oh no... ANNABETH: G D F# Bm Oh, and my step-mom, she hates me, and my dad works all day G* N.C. A D So I left Virginia and I ran away PERCY: D Wait, is that true? LUKE: D Everybody! Chorus: G D A D Oh, things couldn't be worse G D A D When your parents run the universe G D A Bm Oh, things couldn’t be worse G D A D When your folks run the universe LUKE: D (Spoken) Alright, who’s next? KATIE: D Oh! Okay, let me see… KATIE: G D My mom’s Demeter A D Goddess of grain G D A D She gets excited when it starts to rain G D A Bm But planting and planting and planting’s a pain E Oh no... ALL: E Oh no... G D F# Bm Right! For their sixteenth birthday, my friends got a car G* N.C A D I got a fern in some dumb mason jar GROVER: E (Spoken) Bahahahaha! Ooh, ooh! My turn! A E I’m a child of Pan B E The god of the wild A E B E For those who love nature, they’re often beguiled A E B C#m He’s not really my dad, but I’m sort of his child F# Oh no... ALL: F# Oh no... A E G# C#m He went for a hike to explore new frontiers A E B E And no one has seen him for thousands of years Chorus: A E B E Oh, things couldn't be worse A E B E When your parents run the universe A E B C#m Oh, things couldn’t be worse A E B E When your folks run the universe PERCY: E (Spoken) Chiron! Who’s your dad? CHIRON: N.C. (Spoken)Oh, well… A* E* My father is Kronos A* E* Remember my lecture? B* E* He ate his children. LUKE: N.C. E (Spoken) Chiron wins… How about you, Silena? SILENA: A E The goddess of love B E My mom’s Aphrodite A E B E She tries to be cool, but mainly she’s flighty A E B C#m I’ll bring home a boy, and she’s there in her nightie ALL: F# Oh no!!! SILENA: F# (Spoken) It's so embarrassing guys! A E G# C#m I tried to seek help from even the Fates A* N.C. B E ‘Cause she steals my mascara and all of my dates LUKE: F (Spoken) Alright, Percy, it’s your turn PERCY: N.C. If I try to sing, it’ll probably cause an avalanche... LUKE: N.C. We’re all friends here. Come on, give it a shot. PERCY: N.C. Okay. Um… PERCY: Bb* F* My mom was named Sally C* F* She loved scary movies Bb* F* And food that was blue and… KATIE: N.C. (Spoken) He’s doing it wrong SILENA: N.C. Yeah, who’s your godly parent? PERCY: N.C. Oh, I don’t know LUKE: N.C. It’s alright. A lot of half-bloods never know their godly parent. Just give it a try. PERCY: Bb* F* So, my dad is some god C* F* That’s great, I guess Bb* F* C* F* Did he not want me, or not want the stress? Bb* F* C* Dm* Too bad he’s the worst and my life is a mess! G Oh no... Bb F A Dm I hope that he shows even a trace Bb* N.C. C F ‘Cause I’ve got some choice words to throw in his face! Chorus: Bb F C F Oh, things couldn't be worse Bb F C F When your parents run the universe Bb F C Dm Oh, things couldn’t be worse LUKE: F Bb But I don't care where our parents may be C Dm As long as you are here with me ALL: F Bb We don't care where our parents may be C Dm As long as you are here with me F Bb C F* As long as you are here with me!
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