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Key: Eb * = strum once and mute Intro: G A D E7 A7 D A A7 Chorus: D D/C# D7 It's just a little bitty, pissant, country place, G E7 Ain't nothin' much to see, A A7 G A D No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be. A7 D F/Db D7 It's just a piddly squatin' old time country place, G G/F# E7 Ain't nothing too high tone, A A7 Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, G* D But there's nothing dirty going on; G A D Nothing dirty going on.
Verse: D E7 A7 D We get simple farmers, local business men, D B7 E7 A Congress folks from Austin, young boys looking for sin. D D7 G B7 Now we used to get a lot of rough necks, when the oil boom was high, G D B7 E7 A7 D But pay day would get a little rowdy thank God the field run dry. Chorus: D D/C# D7 It's just a little bitty, pissant, country place, G E7 Ain't nothin' much to see, A A7 G A D No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be. A7 D D/C# D7 It's just a piddly squatin' old time country place, G G/F# E7 Ain't nothing too high tone, A A7 Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, G D But there's nothing dirty going on; G A D Nothing dirty going on. Verse: D E7 A7 D I don't hire no married girls, they're not on the ball, D B7 E7 A They got homes and husbands, they're not stable at all. D D7 G B7 You know they don't understand a thing about a proper business day, G D B7 E7 A7 D Now what's the point in opening up the store, if you give the goods away? D E7 A7 D Keep your language clean girls, keep your bedrooms neat, D B7 E7 A And don't hang around the town cafe and say “hi,” on the street. D D7 G B7 Mind your P's and Q's and manners, and you don't need no other tools, G D B7 E7 A7 D ‘Cause every girl that lives here knows, my special no-no rules; G D B7 E7 A7 D Yea every girl that lives here knows, Miss Mona's no-no rules. D Ruby, Ray start em! Bridge 1: D Beds are not to be wallowed in, D7 G That's the kind of thing that big fat lazy hogs do. G And it don't make money! G Betrix! D A A I won't tolerate no tying up my telephone with other peoples' business. A Eloise honey! D And please don't show us no tattoos, D7 G No hearts and flowers on your thigh, G It's downright tacky. D A A7 D Brands belong on cattle, and that ain't what we're selling at Miss Mona's. D D7 Do you catch my drift? G D I pay the food and the rent and the utilities, G D You keep your mind on your work responsibilities. G D Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities, A G D And we can get along. D Dawn! G C G Any bad habits you come in with, get rid of right now, G Tatty Joe! G A7 D I can't stand no chewing gum, it looks just like a cow. D7 Linda Lu! G C G Any one taking sick leave ought to be real sure they're sick, G C And every time you hear that bell D C G You better get here double quick. Bridge 2: C And as for pimps, C Pimps are something you don't need, C7 F To get your daily business done. F Are you listening good? C Keep them leaches and blood suckers off the back roads, F I know how to use a gun, F And nobody messes with my girls. C C7 And any questions you might have about the way I run this place F Don't gripe and whine behind my back, C Just tell me face to face, I'm open-minded, say it all G C C7 Then go upstairs and pack, the door's that-a-way F C She pays the food and the rent and the utilities F C We keep our mind on our work responsibilities F C Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities G F C A A7 And we can get along Chorus: D D/C# D7 It's just a little bitty, pissant, country place, G E7 Ain't nothin' much to see, A A7 G A D No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be. A7 D D/C# D7 It's just a piddly squatin' old time country place, G G/F# E7 Ain't nothing too high tone, A A7 Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, A A7 Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, A A7 Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, G A D But there’s nothing dirty going on; Pah
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