Haircut chords by Lemon Demon

Chords with lyrics

Intro:
B7B7

Part 1:
E minorEm
You ought to get your hair cut, it's getting awfully hippy-like
  A7A7
The barber closes soon, you better make it zippy
D MajorD              C majorC
Like a cheetah sporting some Adidas so you
G+G    C majorC    D MajorD   G+G   C majorC     A minorAm      D MajorD
Run from here to there, as the wind blows through your hair
C majorC      Cmaj7Cmaj7
Suddenly you stop
G+G           A minorAm
Perhaps you like your mop
       D MajorD          BB
Now we gotta know, do you chop it off go to 2.1:
     E minorEm    G+G   A augmentedA   B7B7
Or do you scoff and let it grow? go to 2.2:

Part 2.1:
E minorEm
You run into the store, and meet with Mr Barber
    A7A7
As he starts to cut your hair, the fellow seems to harbour
  D MajorD           C majorC
An improper eagerness to chop your ears off
G+G   C majorC    D MajorD     G+G    C majorC   A minorAm   D MajorD
Suddenly those dull, dull scissors jam into your skull
  C majorC        Cmaj7Cmaj7
The man says oopsie-daisy
  G+G         A minorAm
Sometimes my hands go crazy
        D MajorD
Blood begins to spout
           BB
Do you go to the hospital go to 3.1:
     E minorEm    G+G    A augmentedA    B7B7
Or try to pull the scissors out? go to 3.2:

Part 2.2:
  E minorEm
You stick it to the man that, don't cut your hair don't even shave
  A7A7
For you are now a hippie! You find yourself a sign to wave
  D MajorD            C majorC
And protest fighting for the oppressed people
G+G C majorC    D MajorD   G+G    C majorC   A minorAm D MajorD
Animals and trees, but the system disagrees!
C majorC      Cmaj7Cmaj7
Violence is transpiring
G+G       A minorAm
Cops are open firing
      D MajorD
Riots all around
      BB
Do you run away go to 3.3:
     E minorEm    G+G     A augmentedA     B7B7
Or do you stay and hold your ground? go to 3.4:

Part 3.1:
E minorEm
You run right out the door, and over to the hospital
A7A7
Into the waiting room, which looks just like a moshpit
    D MajorD              C majorC
Full of bleeders flipping through a readers' digest
G+G     C majorC   D MajorD    G+G     C majorC    A minorAm    D MajorD
You queue up in line, behind some guy who broke his spine
C majorC      Cmaj7Cmaj7
Later in the story
   G+G       A minorAm
Your doctor is Hugh Laurie
        D MajorD
Well you gotta laugh
          BB
Should he fix your head go to 4.1:
       E minorEm   G+G  A augmentedA    B7B7
Or should you get his autograph? go to 4.2:

Part 3.2:
E minorEm
You firmly yank the scissors, they're stuck no matter how you strain
A7A7
But now you're feeling tingly, it seems their pressence in your brain
 D MajorD         C majorC
Releases your telekinesis powers
G+G   C majorC  D MajorD  G+G    C majorC    A minorAm    D MajorD
If you so desire objects float or catch on fire
C majorC       Cmaj7Cmaj7
This psychic potential
G+G        A minorAm
Could prove consequential
         D MajorD
Eh, well what the hell.
        BB
Now you wonder should
            E minorEm
You use your powers for good go to 4.3:
  G+G   A augmentedA   B7B7
Or for evil? go to 4.4:

Part 3.3:
E minorEm
You shriek and run away, like a little pansy
A7A7
And you move into the woods, to live like a chimpanzee
    D MajorD            C majorC
Back to nature but you find you hate your neighbours
G+G   C majorC    D MajorD   G+G     C majorC     A minorAm   D MajorD
Mostly its the bears, can't they mind their own affairs?
C majorC         Cmaj7Cmaj7
They've got you surrounded
G+G          A minorAm
Now you're quite confounded
       D MajorD
What is this about?
       BB
Do you try to fight go to 4.5:
      E minorEm  G+G      A augmentedA   B7B7
Or just politely talk things out? go to 4.6:

Part 3.4:
E minorEm
You make it through the riots, the public wants your story told
A7A7
So you write a book, the sales come in low and behold
   D MajorD            C majorC
It's caught on earning you a spot on Oprah
G+G    C majorC     D MajorD   G+G     C majorC     A minorAm   D MajorD
She just smiles and winks. Looks like she's had several drinks...
C majorC          Cmaj7Cmaj7
Half way through the show
G+G       A minorAm
Oprah lets you know
         D MajorD
She must have you now
            BB
Do you slap her in the face go to 4.7:
     E minorEm    G+G     A augmentedA    B7B7
Or do you bow chickachicka wow wow? go to 4.8:

Part 4.1:
E minorEm               A7A7
Hugh Laurie starts to scream, "we have to operate!"
  D MajorD              C majorC
He calls upon his team, there's no time to sedate
G+G  C majorC  A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD   G+G C majorC A minorAm G+G A minorAm C majorC D MajorD
With his charming smirk, he begins to go to work
      C majorC       Cmaj7Cmaj7
But there's one forgotten factor:
   G+G         A minorAm
Hugh Laurie's just an actor
        D MajorD
Turns out he's insane
           BB
Thanks to him you're dead
         E minorEm    G+G    AsusAsus  Cmaj7Cmaj7   G+G
He opened up your head and then he ran off with your brain
Yeah?!

Part 4.2:
E minorEm             A7A7
"Would you be so kind?" You timidly request
 D MajorD            C majorC
"If you wouldn't mind to autograph your breast."
G+G C majorC  A minorAm  C majorC  D MajorD   G+G  C majorC A minorAm  G+G A minorAm C majorC D MajorD
Laurie signs with grace, then he draws a happy face
C majorC        Cmaj7Cmaj7
Quickly with no delay
G+G         A minorAm
You put it up on ebay
      D MajorD
But to no success
          BB
Your auction gets removed
        E minorEm    G+G      AsusAsus   Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G
Ebay says that you violated their terms of service
Oh no.

Part 4.3:
E minorEm            A7A7
You spend all your time, even Friday nights
D MajorD          C majorC
Beating up on crime, wearing spandex tights
  G+G C majorC A minorAm  C majorC D MajorD  G+G C majorC  A minorAm G+G  A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD
Now everyone's a fan, of the psychic scissor man
C majorC         Cmaj7Cmaj7
Now you're making millions
 G+G      A minorAm
Defeating supervillains
        D MajorD
But beneath the fame
        BB
And beneath the cape
      E minorEm    G+G     AsusAsus Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G
There is no escaping from your se - cret shame
Shame

Part 4.4:
E minorEm         A7A7
Quickly you embark, on a trail of hate
D MajorD           C majorC
Creeping in the dark, twisting mankind's fate
    G+G   C majorC    A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD
Now the whole world's in your palms
G+G C majorC A minorAm  G+G  A minorAm C majorC D MajorD
Activate the atom bombs
C majorC        Cmaj7Cmaj7
Several seconds after
G+G      A minorAm           D MajorD
You erupt in laughter, quite maniacally
     BB      E minorEm  G+G   AsusAsus Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G
Ha haha haha ha haha haha ha ha ha ha ha ha hee hee

Part 4.5:
E minorEm            A7A7
You're prepared to fight. The wretched beasts attack
   D MajorD             C majorC
They bear their teeth and bite, but you bite them back
G+G  C majorC   A minorAm   C majorC  D MajorD
Soon you've killed them all.
G+G  C majorC  A minorAm G+G   A minorAm  C majorC  D MajorD
All but one who's much too small
  C majorC         Cmaj7Cmaj7
And since you're not a brute
  G+G          A minorAm
And since that cub's so cute
          D MajorD
You adopt him as a son
          BB
Then that bear and you
     E minorEm  G+G     AsusAsus Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G
Realise a new adventure's just begun
Yeah!

Part 4.6:
E minorEm           A7A7
So you ask them why we can't just get along
D MajorD          C majorC
And the bears reply "You've got us all wrong"
 G+G C majorC  A minorAm  C majorC D MajorD   G+G  C majorC A minorAm  G+G   A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD
"We come from up there! From a place called Planet Bear"
C majorC         Cmaj7Cmaj7
On their ship they take you
G+G         A minorAm            D MajorD
To their home and make you King of all the bears
          BB          E minorEm
And that seals the deal, proving God is real
  G+G    AsusAsus   Cmaj7Cmaj7  G+G
And that he listened to your prayer
Amen

Part 4.7:
E minorEm           A7A7
You slap Oprah's face, at once her loyal staff
D MajorD
Start spraying you with Mace
  C majorC
And Oprah starts to laugh
G+G C majorC  A minorAm C majorC D MajorD
As the audience
G+G C majorC A minorAm  G+G  A minorAm C majorC D MajorD
Overtakes you in defence
C majorC        Cmaj7Cmaj7
Of their lovely hostess
G+G        A minorAm
Now your ass is toast yes
       D MajorD
Sorry my dear friend
          BB
Guess you're gonna die
          E minorEm  G+G     AsusAsus Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G
You better say goodbye because this is the end
You suck

Part 8:
E minorEm           A7A7
You and Oprah kiss, the audience goes wild
D MajorD         C majorC
Voyeuristic bliss, suddenly you're piled
G+G C majorC  A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD
On the studio floor
G+G  C majorC A minorAm   G+G A minorAm C majorC  D MajorD
Now it starts to get hardcore
C majorC      Cmaj7Cmaj7
On live television
G+G       A minorAm
Passionate collision
      D MajorD        BB
Evidential love, genuine romance
        E minorEm     G+G    AsusAsus Cmaj7Cmaj7 G+G