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Dead Men Don't Need Season Tickets by Half Man Half Biscuit

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(intro) F#  E  (x4)

E          Eb  B              D                     F#
 Telephone call telling me my old friend Graham had died
         E                  Eb              G#m        F#
I took a ride down to where I could be of assistance.
E              Eb  B                D                   F#
 I said to his wife don?t give into grieving cliché and turn
                E           Eb                      G#m     F#
His side of the room into a shrine, it just doesn?t work.
        

                 B       F#         B
My arm round her shoulder, gently I told her
E         Eb                G#m      (instr) F#  E (x4)
 Dead men don?t need season tickets.

E              Eb  B                    D                     F#
 Now that he?s gone you?re gonna need a helping hand with the lawn
        E                     Eb                   G#m          F#
Various chores ? not least of all, those funeral arrangements.
E          Eb B                D                   F#
 If I were you I?d get myself away from all that relates
            E                 Eb             G#m       F#
Week in the lakes, reasonable rates early September.

B      F#                B
Now I?m no hotelier, just thought I?d tell yer
E         Eb                G#m      F#
 Dead men don?t need season tickets.

          B       F#         B
Maybe I?m forward, maybe I?m morbid
E         Eb                G#m     F#
 Dead men don?t need season tickets.

E         Eb                G#m            
 Dead men don?t need season tickets.
F#            B  F#            B
 In the mortuary, in the mortuary
F#            B  F#            B       F# E  F# E  F# E  F#
 In the mortuary, in the mortuary.