99 Of Gargoyles Look Like Bob Todd chords by Half Man Half Biscuit

E B7 E B7 (faster) E B7 E B7 E B7 E B7
(no chord)                   E B7 E B7 (faster) E B7 E B7 E B7 E B7
Jesus Christ - come on down!
       E             B7             E             B7
If you ever wondered how you get triangles from a cow
         E                B7
You need butter, milk and cheese
       E           B7        E B7 E B7
And an equilateral chainsaw.
E         B7            E    B7 E             B7             E    B7
In debt I owe someone a fiver; maybe I should try my hand at drag
E              B7              E      B7
James Dean was just a careless driver
    E          B7             E     B7 E B7 E B7 E B
And Marilyn Monroe was just a slag.
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E    B7 E B7 E B7 E B7
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd.
E          B7              E              B7
Mary had a little lamb the doctors were astounded
E              B7        E            B7      E B7 E B7
Everywhere she went gynaecologists surrounded.
             E               B7                E            B7
They've been cooking on Blue Peter now they're sampling the dishes
         E               B7
'I don't normally like tomatoes John
    E          B7       E B7 E B7 E B7 E B
But this is delicious'.
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E      G D7 G D7 G D7 G D7
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd.
    G            D7           G        D7  G
The son of Jimmy Clitheroe is shouting out -
D7             G      D7 G D7 G D7 G D7  E B7 E B7 E B7 E B7
'Where's my Fiorucci?'--------------
        E            B7              E               B7
Now the Krona rumour spread but they didn't tell the bread
        E        B7              E     B7 E B7
Did you honestly think that they would?
       E            B7       E          B7
And if eight out of ten cats all prefer Whiskers
       E            B7         E     B7 E B7 E B7 E B
Do the other two prefer Lesley Judd?
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7            E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
E                B7(slower)    E
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd.