Epiphany chords by Half Man Half Biscuit

Chords with lyrics

Intro 1:
(Talking)

A minorAm
   I can recall the day quite clearly. A augmentedA Friday in July. A augmentedA sweltering eighty degrees.
A minorAm
Martin Jarvis was completing his week in dictionary corner; he’d been reassuringly average.
A minorAm
Somewhere in the Shires, surgeons had entered the mind of Mr Stinchcombe and found black apes,
A minorAm
gibbering on dark lawns. I’d spent the afternoon becoming increasingly frustrated with the
A minorAm
grooming agitator on my lime Dyson. I was due in Parbold at seven fifteen, and wasn’t going to make it.
A minorAm
Telephoning the person who needed to know this, I found myself caught up on a crossed line,
A minorAm
something I’d not experienced for years. I listened in with quiet delight.

Intro 1 cont.:
(Talking)

A minorAm
It appeared that someone called Bill, whilst out walking the bounds that morning,
A minorAm
had looked in to Top Acre, and been horrified to see the almost visible ribcage of a foal,
A minorAm
which belonged to the straggle-haired girl from Keeper’s cottage, whose name,
A minorAm
if this was a Helen Fielding novel, would be something like ‘Martha Flanagan’.
A minorAm
But the countryside is never as romantic as townsfolk believe it to be,
A minorAm
and the girl’s name was Karen Henderson. On closer inspection of the poor emaciated beast,
A minorAm
it was agreed that a visit upon the child’s father was in order.
A minorAm
Not a mission to relish apparently, as the man in question was affected by a strange disquiet,
A minorAm
which gnawed away at his faith, and it was rumoured his days were spent sucking on the
A minorAm
bleached bones of his dead mates, whilst writing songs for the hospice – one of which goes like this:


Verse 1:

          E MajorE    A minorAm             E MajorE    A minorAm
Na na na na na na na na na na na,  Na na na na na na na na na na na
           E MajorE    A minorAm             E MajorE    A minorAm
Na na na na na na na na na na na,  Na na na na na na na na na na na.

Oh sucking on the bleached bones of my dead mates
                      E MajorE             A minorAm
Trying to get to Parbold for a quarter past seven, and it isn’t gonna happen.

Verse 2:

      E MajorE            A minorAm     E MajorE
Hospice, I think you’re marvellous, hospice I sing your praises
A minorAm    E MajorE         A minorAm        E MajorE
 On high days and holidays; I big you up on high days and holidays
A minorAm        E MajorE         A minorAm         E MajorE
 I hear you go on some good outings; I’d like to go on one of your outings
A minorAm             E MajorE
 Please take me with you on one of your outings.


Chorus:

A augmentedA        D MajorD    A augmentedA    E MajorE
 I heard you’re going to Billing Aquadrome
A augmentedA       D MajorD    A augmentedA    E MajorE
 I hear you’re going to Billing Aquadrome
A augmentedA      D MajorD    A augmentedA    E MajorE
 I’ve never been to Billing Aquadrome
A augmentedA     D MajorD      A augmentedA    E MajorE
 Let me go with you to Billing Aquadrome
A augmentedA       D MajorD   A augmentedA    E MajorE    A augmentedA D MajorD A augmentedA E MajorE  A augmentedA D MajorD A augmentedA E MajorE
 Please let me go to Billing Aquadrome……………..


Coda:

    A augmentedA    D MajorD     A augmentedA    E MajorE
I’ll be busking this at Embankment
    A augmentedA    D MajorD     A augmentedA    E MajorE
I’ll be busking this at Embankment
    A augmentedA    D MajorD     A augmentedA    E MajorE   A augmentedA   D MajorD A augmentedA E MajorE A augmentedA D MajorD A augmentedA E MajorE
I’ll be busking this at Embankment tube tomorrow.
A augmentedA      D MajorD   A augmentedA E MajorE A augmentedA  D MajorD