Have Some Madeira Mdear chords by Flanders And Swann

C
She was young, she was pure, she was new, she was nice
                 G
She was fair, she was sweet seventeen
    F              C     Am
He was old, he was vile, and no stranger to vice
    D            G
He was base, he was bad, he was mean
     C         F
He had slyly inveigled her up to his flat
  Dm           G
To view his collection of stamps
    C     F      C     Am
And he said as he hastened to put out the cat
   F            G
The wine, his cigar and the lamps

 C
Have some madeira, m'dear
              G
You really have nothing to fear
   F               C      Am
I'm not trying to tempt you, that wouldn't be right
   D             G
You shouldn't drink spirits at this time of night
 C
Have some madeira, m'dear
               G
It's really much nicer than beer
  F             C       Am
I don't care for sherry, one cannot drink stout
   D          G
And port is a wine I can well do without
   C    F     C     Am
It's simply a case of chacun a son gout
 F      G    C
Have some madeira, m'dear

  C
Unaware of the wiles of the snake-in-the-grass
                G
And the fate of the maiden who topes
   F             C      Am
She lowered her standards by raising her glass
   D             G
Her courage, her eyes and his hopes
   C               F
She sipped it, she drank it, she drained it, she did
   Dm          G
He promptly refilled it again
    C     F    C        Am
And he said as he secretly carved one more notch
    F            G
On the butt of his gold-headed cane

 C
Have some madeira, m'dear,
               G
I've got a small cask of it here
   F              C      Am
And once it's been opened, you know it won't keep
  D           G
Do finish it up, it will help you to sleep
 C
Have some madeira, m'dear,
             G
It's really an excellent year
  F             C      Am
Now if it were gin, you'd be wrong to say yes
  D            G
The evil gin does would be hard to assess
  C       F     C     Am
Besides it's inclined to affect me prowess
 F      G    C
Have some madeira, m'dear

       C
Then there flashed through her mind what her mother had said
              G
With her antepenultimate breath
     F              C      Am
"Oh my child, should you look on the wine that is red
    D              G
Be prepared for a fate worse than death"
   C             F
She let go her glass with a shrill little cry
 Dm              G
Crash! tinkle! it fell to the floor
    C        F      C     Am
When he asked, "What in Heaven?" she made no reply
    F            G
Up her mind, and a dash for the door

 C
Have some madeira, m'dear,
                 G
Rang out down the hall loud and clear
   F          C       Am
A tremulous cry that was filled with despair
    D              G
As she paused to take breath in the cool midnight air
 C
Have some madeira, m'dear,
                 G
The words seemed to ring in her ear
  F             C     Am
Until the next morning, she woke up in bed
     D           G
With a smile on her lips and an ache in her head
    C      F       C      Am
And a voice in her ear 'ole that tickled and said
 F      G    C
Have some madeira, m'dear