Three Point One Four (Ver2) Chords

Key: D 🎸 Intro: *finger style* D A Bm A x2 🎸 Verse 1: D My last girlfriend didn't like me D Thought she might be most likely a dyke D A She just didn't excite me A Lefty? Yeah, but that was all right A She was hotter than the sun but she just wasn't that bright Bm My mistake, she was more flaky than a leper colony Bm I think a wooden clothespin would have been much better company A Ass like a donkey actin' funky A Gave her L, now she's a flunky A So my love for her died quicker than a batch of Sea Monkeys D Early bird gets the worm D Spread your legs or spread the word D So what if I'm not the smartest peanut in the turd? A I'm white, which goes with everything A But I can come in any color A And I'm looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother Bm But it's hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushy Bm And how many girls do you know Bm That can play the harmonica with their pussies? A Like 'em easy and hot and sweet A Like a Rice Krispie Treat G A N.C You know what I really want in a girl? Me

🎸 Chorus: D A Bm A I need to find a new vagina D A Bm A Any kind of new vagina D A Bm A It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina D A Calvin Klein? Kind of Bm A North Carolina 🎸 Verse 2: D Women are like dog doo D Hear me through, don't interrupt A It's just the older that they are, the easier they get to pick up D I'd fill the generation gap D Clean the cobwebs from her rafters D Old hens would rather put out than be put out to the pasture A No age just ain't a gauge A I like my girls like my cheese A Preferably for me, fat-free American singles only Bm I want my next chick anorexic Bm The winner is the thinner A Won't have to take her skinny ass out to a fancy dinner D Like Sizzler D She got a beef, we'll chew the fat A If I forget to put the seat up I can put up with her crap A Let her lash out and crack the whip Bm But not in bed I don't play rough Bm No I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up A Just independent like NOFX A Smart like Janeane Garofalo Bm She'd use big words to make fun of me so that I would never know A Bestow upon me all her wisdom of the Dewey Decimal System G A N.C You know what I really want in a girl? Me 🎸 Chorus: D A Bm A I need to find a new vagina D A Bm A Any kind of new vagina D A Bm A It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina D A Calvin Klein? Kind of Bm A North Carolina 🎸 Chorus: D A Bm A I need to find a new vagina D A Bm A Any kind of new vagina D A Bm A It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina D A Calvin Klein? Kind of Bm A North Carolina 🎸 Outro: D Vagina A Vagina Bm Vagina A Vagina D Vagina A Vagina Bm Vagina A Vagina